Sex Education in Elementary School. Are we ready?

I decided to investigate this topic while driving up route 93 this past Tuesday. I work as a nanny for two great little boys. We were on our way home from a trip to the aquarium when the youngest, we'll call him Tom, who is 3 asked me how he got out of his mommies belly. I froze! I had no idea what to tell him, I hadn't prepared for this conversation at all. I knew someday when I had kids of my own this topic would come up, but boy did he catch me off guard. Every family gives different explanations of where babies come from and I didn't want to give him information that may upset his parents so all I said was "hmmm, well maybe you should ask your mommy" At that point it was all I could come up with.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure we are past the days of telling children they were delivered by a stork. But if that's so, what are we telling them, what sort of vocabulary are using with them. I'm assuming that if a 3 year old boy is asking me, it's a possibility that a student may ask me. Even in preschool we deal with sex, we read literature where animals are being born, babies are being born etc. When I was in school sex ed didn't start until around middle school. Times have changed though, sex is everywhere. We can't guard our children from being exposed to things that deal with sex or sexuality for very long. I'm not saying this is a good or bad thing, I'm just saying as educators it is something that we are going to need to deal with.

These days it seems hard to talk about anything without mixing in a little politics. While researching I came across so many sites titled Obama supports "Learning about sex before Learning to read". Of course that seems a little far fetched. But I do think its important to begin teaching at least about sexuality at an early age. Teaching children what is okay and what is not okay. Who can touch you, who cant touch you, and where and so on and so forth. This is mainly for their protection. My feeling is that if we have open conversations and don't act ashamed to use certain vocabulary with our children they may feel more comfortable coming to us if they do find them selves in an unfortunate situation.

From what I understand school districts can determine what is taught, and how much time is allotted to teach this, I really think that there ought to be a state wide standard for what is being taught at each grade level, why shouldn't it be part of our education standards that we must meet while writing our lesson plans. While researching I found some guidelines that I felt were very appropriate. "children in early elementary school should learn the names of the reproductive organs, that masturbation should be done in a private place, that they should turn to their families for love and support, and that people .have different values and life styles that should be respected. At the late elementary-school level, children should learn about different sexual orientations, basic biological information about sexual reproduction, how puberty will affect their bodies, and that sexual intercourse is not for children, the guidelines Say" (Education Week New Guide Calls for Broad Approach to Sex Education).I think this provides adequate information for children.

By allowing school districts to determine when things are being taught, many are waiting until middle school. For budget reasons, religious reasons, in order to not upset parents, etc. However by the time middle school comes around students have learned about sex through the wrong outlets. Many students in middle school these days are beginning to experiment with sex. A story I found online about a pair of middle school students were engaging in sexual activities in a class room (Officials: Middle School Students Caught in Sex Act in Class).

As an educator of young children I would really like to have specific rules and regulations on what I am allowed to teach and what I am not allowed to teach. This is such a sensitive and touchy subject to many. I'd like to be confident that the words coming out of my mouth are words that the state approves of and are explanations that students are capable of understanding.

In a world where we are bombarded with sexual references and material every day, we need to help children appropriately make sense of what is happening. I believe that if we start teaching children appropriate information at an early age they might have a better chance to know how to filter out inappropriate information and messages. It might be a long shot, but considering where we are today(middle school students having sex) something needs to change.